Wednesday Feb 1st 1995. Wotcha Slimes! Well, thus endeth January. Pretty average month I spoze. And now February has come barging in all over the place. Now that I have loads of new catalogues I worked my butt off sticking them in envelopes this morning. I tapped out lots of letters too which was thouroughly interesting and exciting work (I don't bloody think). Hopefully, this will bring armfulls of swag my way. I didn't get ANY post this morning! BLAAAHHH! I need some money, NOW! I'm off out on the tap this weekend in Birmingham so I need some sheets to spend on GROG. I met Mike up the town in the afternoon. This wasn't meant to happen until tomorrow but fate must have been on the gin so it got the days mixed up. (Errrrrmm, wot's that Kenz??) Anyway, Mike gave me a fiver which he owed me along with the good news that Antics have already sold one of my tapes! GIBBER! They've only been on the shelf one day. Cooooooool! I got my colour Trek labels today. Not bad. Some of the shading went a bit odd but that's because I didn't update the colours on the second page. Do you care though folks? Nope, nor me. I think I have FINISHED the flyer for 'Commodore Zone'!! Once I have the laser-printed version I can send copies to all the people who will be writing articles. SORTED. In the evening I watched the first episode of 'Thief Takers' which I thought was surprisingly good. A bit Americanised on the weapons front but quite good viewing nonetheless. There you have it. That's the first day of February finito. See ya tomorrow! From:- Krap. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Thursday Feb 2nd 1995. Yawnnnn. I think my name is 'Mr Groggy' today. I had a sort of 'slap catalogues in envelopes' type day today. Well, that's what I spent the morning doing anyway. Thrill factor = 0. After my lovely lunch which consisted of pizzas (throat pizzas?) I went up the town to pay a few squires into the bank, shove all the catalogues I prepared in the post-box and get some photocopying done. Once back home I decided to repair my leather gloves which are falling to bits. They look like the ones Arnie was wearing at the end of T2. I spent the evening watching soaps and compiling a Galway music disk using the tunes Waz sent me. And that's all I'm going to type because I'm bloody knackered. Cheerie-Oh. From:- Kentucky Fried Kenz. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Friday Feb 3rd 1995. Wahey! It's FRIDAY! Got a package fom Waz this morning. He sent me a mass of Tim Follin tunes. Wicked! He also sent his strange 'lottery' prog so I ran it once and spent a quid on those numbers. May the mighty Crom send luck and good fortune raining down on Binary Zone PD. (A large fortune would be nice). I got yet more catalogues posted today, including some overseas ones. While up the town I found the adhesive plastic that I wanted to cover my Star Trek labels with. (In fact, I walked into WH Smiths and found it instantly!) so now I have 12 glossy 'Next Generation' video tapes with luvverly shiny labels. Cool. It was cruddy pot-noodle time today. Blegggg. I put too much water in it so it ended up being a pot-dishwater. In the evening I had a lengthy chat with Jason Kelk and FeekZoid also rang. He's gone Trek mad! He can't wait to see the movie 'Generations' and neither can I come to think of it. Time for beddie-byes now. Ciao! From:- Knebble. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Saturday Feb 4th 1995. Howdy Earthlets. Slobbed around the house this morning. Mucho fun (NOT). Got bored with doing that so I ventured up the town to get some spends out of the bank for tonights japery. In the afternoon I decided to watch the widescreen version of 'Raiders Of The Lost Ark'. Bloody CLASSIC movie. It was doing that vid for Andy Roberts that gave me the idea to watch it and ... He rang up while I was watching the film! OO-EE-OO! Spooky. There was a mad dash to get ready after that becuase it was time to go 'oot on the tap'. Had an excellent evening with lots of booze, snooker, pool, darts and GIRLS. There was this one girl ... She left a definite imprint on my memory ... All I can say about her is ... TITS! (Big ones! Tight top! F'K!) Cool thing I shouted across club: "Hey Luce, the taxi has arrived, get your heart-shaped ass over here!" Got pretty wrecked on lager, had a huge curry, ended up wearing most of it. I'm gonna feel like shit in the morning ... Boilk. Got home about 2:30 am. Fell asleep about 30 seconds later. ZZzzZZzzZZzz. From:- Kaplop. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Sunday Feb 5th 1995. My brain hurts. GROAN. Felt like shit this morning (surprise surprise). Didn't blow chunks or anything dramatic like that but my mouth feels GROSS. I don't remember eating the contents of a dustbin last night. I actually woke up at 10:00am. This is pretty rare for for me but I needed the kip. Once I was up and about I got my 'trench-mouth' cleared up and got to work on the vid for Andrex Robotnik. Finshed the sucker too thanks to 'Under Pressure - Making the Abyss'. He's gonna love that. I then crashed into the 'energy gap' and fell asleep! Was woken up by the phone ringing at 5:00pm. It was FeekZoid. We had a quick chat which ended at about 8:00pm (!). Watched 'HOME ALONE' which was pretty good fun. It was better than what I remembered anyway. Spent the rest of the evening playing 'Tower Assault'. Got pretty far but those bastard 'red alert' levels got me. You know, where you have three seconds to negotioate a massive level or else you die ... I died. Don't you just hate it when that happens? I'm gonna watch 'Monty Pythons Holy Grail' in bed now so ... G'night. From:- Kengff. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Monday Feb 6th 1995. Riddle Bibble Readers. What shall I type about today? Errrm, well, I farted around with some Binary Zone orders but didn't get any wrapped up because everyone wants a 'Commodore Zone' flyer. It's a pity I won't get them until tomorrow isn't it?! Had a bit of a blast on 'Tower Assault'. Got further than ever but then I got bored rigid as the difficulty level shot through the ceiling. Grrr. Oooo! Then events took an unexpected turn. Mike rang and he said he was free in the evening. This means I'll get the 'Commodore Zone' flyer TODAY! Before I went to Mikes I finished taping 'Super Empire'. I managed to knock about 30 mins off the length of it (fnarr) so I might just squeeze 'Super Jedi' on the tape too. Kewl. At long last I can give those bloody SNES carts back to Mike. After watching 'Buck Rogers' (Ardala Returns! Shwing!) and choffing some 'toad in the hole' I zzoomed off to Mikes. The good news was the flyer was there. The bad news was I buggered up the 'Mayhem' pic! AAARGH! Looks like I'll be getting the finished flyer tomorrow after all. Classic 'thirsty' jokes of the day: "I wouldn't say I was thirsty but my tongue is covered in camel shite". "I wouldn't say I was thirsty but my mouth says 'Welcome to Arrakis' in it". (You need to have seen 'Dune' to get the second one). Got back to the Zone at about 11:20pm. Hit the sheets to read more of 'Dark Force Rising' by Timothy Zahn. May the force be with you. From:- Kenztoo-deetoo. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Tuesday Feb 7th 1995. Achtung! You vist da hat! CRUNCH! That was noise of a package arriving from Android Tampax this morning. It contained some C64 digi-graphic demo's and 3 blank tapes. As he wanted the C64 PD music mix I thought I'd re-vamp the inlay a bit. The new version is much better - especially in 'new ribbon-o-vision'. Began dumping all the 'Xmas Chortles' game files onto floppy for Andy too. SEVEN DISKS it took. The game is LARGE! Met Mike after lunch. He had printed the 99% complete 'Commodore Zone' flyer which I decided was good enough to be sent out so I got ten copies done straight away. The new series of 'Babylon 5' began tonight. COOL! They have altered it a bit but I soon got into the swing of things. Delenn is about to emerge from her cocoon. I hope she hasn't changed into a saddle-bag head. Finally got the chance to sit and check out the demo's Andy sent. Some of the pictures were pretty cool and some were pretty dull. There's loads of tunes on the disks though. HEHE! Ripriprip! I'm knackered and I can't be bothered to do anything else today. See ya tomorrow! From:- Klank. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Wednesday Feb 8th 1995. OI! What the frig do you think YOU'RE looking at? Oh, this diary ... Okay, I'll let you off. (This time!) Enough irrellivance. Welcome to Wednesday! Quite a lot of post today. Someone decided it would be a bit of a hoot to pay for disks using STAMPS so I now have over four quids worth of the bleeders. AHA! Time to get some letters done methinks. That should get rid of some of them. Got a bloody great demo from Phil today. It's called 'Access Denied' and it features wonderful music. It gave me the idea to start 'Update 10'! (Gulp!) The legacy of Android Spazm's package continues. I decided to update the inlay for the 'C64 PD MUSIC MIX 2' so they both match. Also, I did a list of all the fonts I want Andy to send me. Oh, and I added 'Access Denied' to the C64 disks I'm gonna send him. Now all I need to do is a letter with instructions of how to install 'Xmas Chortles' and get his package wrapped up. Easy peasy. (?) Blasted up the town to post all my goodies. Had trouble stuffing Bill Oddie in the post-box. (Oh har-de-har!) Sorry about that. Ummmm, did me photocopies and actually assembled a disk catalogue in the post-office - staples too! Began compiling the 'Galway' preview tape for Fu Sang Li. Got ALL of side 1 sorted but side 2 will be tricky because I don't know what I'm gonna shove on it. Gah! Then I switched on my Amiga, loaded up this disk and typed todays diary chuckles. Yippee! Gotta go, got to see a bed about some sleep. Byeeee! From:- Pork Krackles. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Thursday Feb 9th 1995. Yakki Daaaaa! Hey ho gang, I'm Mr rush everywhere today. Made an early start and got a BZ order sorted straight away. Vragged out the house at about 10:30am to the post-office and then carried on to Rich's house. I got the 'Xmas Chortles' game installed on his hard-drive and it worked splendidly. I used the disks I prepared for Andrex Rubberoid which got his version of the game tested quite nicely. Rich lent me his 'Super Return Of The Jedi' cart and gave me my controller back which I lent him in 1872. Whizzed back home at about 1:00pm and then Mike arrived with the 'T2 Arcade Game' cart for the SNES. We eagerly sat down and prepared for an awesome coin-op conversion because we'd be told the game is EXCELLENT. Unfortunately, our source LIED to us because the game was a pile of poo. 'Super Return Of The Jedi' was not poo at all. In fact, I played it for most of the day and evening too! I had a break to watch the 'X-Files'. (Scully did something different with her hair! Berlimey! That phenomena deserves to be an X-File!) Guess what I did folks ... I completed 'Jedi'! On the same day I borrowed it too. (AGAIN). Rich said he couldn't do the final level but I did it without too many hassles. The Millenium Falcon roared out of the new Death Stars superstructure way ahead of that titanic flood of fire. (Well, a good few inches ahead of it anyway). Finally, I watched 'The Little Picture Show'. Well, actually I watched Mariella Frostrup ... HEHEHE! G'night! From:- Obi Wan Kenzobi. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Friday Feb 10th 1995. Hailing Frequencies OPEN. Another busy (and knackering) day for me today chums. Began things by putting the finishing touches to Android Spazms MONSTER SENDING! There's heaps of great stuff to wade through in his jiffy. Got an 'action stations' phonecall from Mike so I left the Zone and headed to Mikes house via the bank and also the post-office to drop off that massive package for Andy. When I got to Mikes we waited for his 'Dennis Nedry-esque' mate to arrive before we all headed off to:- THE UCI CINEMA!! Yes fanz, STAR TREK - GENERATIONS was released today and we were there for its FIRST SHOWING!! So, how was it?! BRILLIANT! EXCELLENT! AMAZING! (Enthuse, enthuse). It was superb seeing our 'Next Generation' chums up there on the big screen. Damn fine. We then hit the 'KFC' but there was no sign of the girl with immaculate complexion. Bah! I ate TONS of food there today. Yesssssss. Once back home I threw on the Trek 'Astral Symphonies' CD and generally Chilled out until 'The Word' was on. It was cool this week because EVERYTHING went wrong! I then taped 'Beavis & Butt-Head' before dashing off to the land of nod. Hmmmm, although today was busy I haven't written all that much about it. Oh well! Ciao for a tad. From:- Klibble. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Saturday Feb 11th 1995. Hallo Diary, Didn't do all that much today. I got the tape for Fu Sang Li finished. It took a LOOOONG time to complete but the end result is quite funky. Hit the town and drew out some sheets to finance tomorrows capers. I also spent two quid on the lottery. I should have bunged that cash straight down the drain for all the good it did. BAHHH! Gladiators was pretty decent today because Jet made quite a few appearances. She is a BABE! Shwiiiiinnnnngggggg! I tapped in our questionairre answers for the 'Xmas Chortles' comic thingy. Very amusing indeedy. Errrrrrmmmmmmm, Android Spazms rang to confirm the monster package reached him totally unscathed. Kewl. He hasn't waded through all the goodies yet though. Had a blast on 'Jedi' and played it on 'Jedi' level. It's HARD! And that's about it! I told you I didn't do much but NOOOOOOOOO, you didn't believe me ... HA! Then I was abducted by aliens and stuff like that (probably). Seee yoooo. From:- Knezznekkle. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Sunday Feb 12th 1995. Wotcha froods. Leaped out of bed gushing with enthusiasm but as soon as the novelty of being awake wore off I decided not to do all that much. Got a few BZ inlay bits sorted out and farted around doing IFF 'frames' which will be ported onto the PC. I then got lumbered with the task of moving massive pieces of furniture from the garage into the house. After much humping (hoo! hoo!) the job was done. Collett arrived at a BAD time and was forced to help. This was too much so we departed rapidly to collect Mez and Mike. Yup fans, It's time for the second UCI trip to see 'Generations'!! We had our obligatory (Wok, wok, obliggablogga) 'KFC'. The girl with immaculate complexion was there but she was on 'drive-in' duty so I didn't see much of her. CURSES! Watched the magnificent 'Generations' movie again. It still kicks ASS! It's a pity that Mike moaned about the quality of the sound, picture and temperature of the cinema. Guess who won't be coming with us in the future?!?! Once back home I watched this naff program on TV called 'Buccaneers' which featured tasty jumbly-girls falling out of their dresses. Slavver! Then I watched 'Airplane II' before ... ZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzz. Byeee! From:- Kung Fu. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Monday Feb 13th 1995. Eskiddlybiddlybe! Aaaaalright! Aaaaalright! Caaaaalm down! Caaaaalm down! Hey! Are yous friggin' readin' this? Friggin' soft lad! (Deactivate Scouse-Mode). Ah! Greetings cheps and ladies. What did Kenzoid get up to today I hear you all cry. It arsed down with rain in the morning so I decided to tap out some letters to chums like Alf Yngve, Betrayer etc. Got quite a few done too! I also got that tape for Fu Sang Li posted. The flipping thing had better load after all the time I spent making it. I thought I'd liven up the letter typing by playing 'Xmas Chortles 3' loudly. Unfortunately it kept making me laff and putting me off. All those farts and that abrasive language was just too much for me. HEHE! I got a few ideas for 'Commodore Zone' today. I need to get an Apex feature sent off and had this idea of a 'raid' on the Digital Graffiti office armed with 'super soakers' for some baffling reason. Hmmmmm. Thinking about it, I didn't do much else other than type lots of letters today. Sodding Crikey! I've been at it all day! (Fnarr! - I WISH!) Tape of the day: 'Xmas Chortles 3'. Track of the day: 'Mark IV' (Hypnopedia). Time to hit the sheets and read more 'Dark Force Rising'. Go on then, bugger off. Leave me be! From:- Konan. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Tuesday Feb 14th 1995. Nyip Nyip Wheep Wheep! Yaaaawwwwwwwn! I am KNACKERED today folks so don't expect masses of text typing because I think I may fall asleep on the Keyboard! I've got the 'yawns' too, sorry about that. (Yawn) Ermmm, A mass of 'Commodore Zone' articles arrived today but muggins here has got to type them all into my trusty A1200. Hmmmm, the things I do ... (Yawn). Got a package for Waz all sorted out and posted today. (Yawn). Met Mike up the town and then headed off for 'PC land'. Spent ages on it doing all sorts of funky things. I have tweaked 'Update 9' AGAIN, done an inlay for the 'Shoot Em Up Destruction Set', typeset an article for 'Commodore Zone' and some other stuff which currently slips my mind. Zoomed home at warp 9.2 just in time to record 'Babylon 5'. Delenn has finally emerged from her cocoon!! The rumours were right, she is HUMAN! But is she a babe? Hmmmm, not sure yet ... (Yawn). And that's yer lot for now ... (Yawn). G'night! From:- Klack. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Wednesday Feb 15th 1995. Oh bloody hell! Spent most of the morning pithering around trying to get 'Sceptre' duplicated onto TAPE. The bugger chewed up and refused to work. I even dismantled some old covertapes to use their good spools but I still had no luck. AAAARGH! I HATE TAPES!! TAPES SUCK! The only other thing I managed to get done was a few BZ disks for an order. I LOVE DISKS!! DISKS RULE! Had a pretty splendid lunch today though, I found some DONER KEBABS in the freezer! They were 'microwave friendly' so I nuked one of the suckers and scoffed heartily. Mike rang just after that and I sped off to meet him. Spent an absolute AGE doing a new flyer for the 'Mayhem' compilation. Collett turned up later on and we wowed him with games like 'Heretic', 'Tie Fighter' and of course, 'Wing Commander III'! Got trench-head watching all that PC stuff. Tried to watch a film in bed I fell asleep just after it had started. See ya soon! From:- Kilrathi. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Thursday Feb 16th 1995. Flibble Sklitch! Yo gang! Here we go for yet another diary entry. Received an order for some BZ swag AND blank disks this morning so I duly got that sorted out and parcel-wrapped. I also filled FIVE disks with goodies for Jason Kelk. I also compiled him an Amiga disk which features a BootGirl piccy, note, demo's, ShowVIC etc. That should impress him a tad. Nuked the last remaining kebab for me lunch. Nice pitta-bread, NICE AND HARD!! Oh well, you can't have everything. Left the house in the RAIN to post my parcel and pay some loot into the bank. Sort of slobbed around the house a bit after that. Went into random 'ogle' mode which inspired THIS strange selection of award winners for today:- 'Most loveable female' award:- Josie Lawrence as Maggie in Outside Edge. 'Cute girly of the day' award:- Martina / FUN HOUSE! (pervert). 'I wish she would wear a short skirt' award - Agent Scully / X-Files. 'She's cute but she looked crap today' award - Trish McDonald. 'She's cute but why is she a lesbian?' award - Zoe Tate / Emmerdale. Oooooh yeah, I mucked around with PlaySID and got it so it ran from the CLI. I thought this would be COOL for slideshows but PlaySID devours processor time - even on the A1200! Bah. Time to go. BYEEEE! From:- Kerplunk. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Friday Feb 17th 1995. Is somebody cooking KIPPERS?! Greets gang. I did a 10,000 mile walk today! Yup, I ventured bravely into the City of Worcester to get some much needed bits 'n bobs. Got plenty of photocopies sorted out first of all. This blonde BABE did them for me. She was leaning all over the photocopier and I ogled her without LOOKING like I was ogling her. Drool! Letch! Ermmmm, ahummm. Spend several hours in Antics nattering about all sorts of fascinating subjects (?) Mike arrived in Antics and handed over my Mayhem flyer which looked pretty funky. Once I had finished in Worcester me and Mike hit Droitwich town centre before traipsing to his place. There I finally saw the end sequence for 'Wing Commander III' which was a tad nice. The Kilrathi were sent straight to HELL! Plodded home after that. I'd done so much walking my legs reached Jelly-mode! Watched brookie (Beth is a BABE!) and generally recovered from the days events. Oh, I even managed to stay conscious for the 'Word' and juuuust about managed to tape Beavis & Butt-Head which was cool! Huhuh! mh! huh! T.T.F.N. From:- Klibby. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Saturday Feb 18th 1995. "Can you fly Bobby?" Ho hum fans. Utterly unexciting day today I'm afraid. Lots of letters written and catalogues prepared. I did get a few obscure things in my 'in-tray' sorted though. Ooo yeah, I got a huge wad of laser-prints from Alf today. It was part of a manuscript for his new novel! I was given the obscure task of designing a Birthday cake on my A1200 today! I had to draw a bat-logo which was then reproduced on the cake. The end result was sodding SUPERB! Perhaps I'm in the wrong business. "To the batcake!" Arf arf! All this bat-stuff put me in the mood to watch 'Batman Returns'. I cranked the surround volume right up. The Danny Elfman music sounded MAGNIFICENT! I really haven't got all that much else to add I'm afraid. Oh yeah, Robocop was on Central tonight. Those bastards cut every bit of swearing and violence and really spoiled that great film. "Ladies leave"!!! Gnnnnnn! "You burned the freaking money"!! Aaaargh! "That guy is a real air head" ... Shite. Track of the day:- Prophecy Theme (Dune Soundtrack). Seeee-yooooo. From:- RoboKenz. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Sunday Feb 19th 1995. Flib Flab Flob Readers! It's me Moms birthday today folks. This meant I was woken up at some sodding early hour by my little brother who gets all excited about birthdays and whatnot. Oh, the bat-cake I mentioned yesterday was NOT for me Mom by the way! All the usual birthday type stuff duly followed with lots of cards and prezzies being opened. Then preparations were then made for the big pardey which was happening later in the day. All this was too much for me so disappeared upstairs and read some of the third Star Wars novel I bought in Worcester on Friday. The party was pretty cool. Lots of bottled Heineken was skulled by Moi and I showed off the awesome 'exploding shoe' footage and Chortles game to Uncles Dave & Kev! Didn't do any work today, just partied and ate heaps of buffet. Rad! See ya soon! From:- Karlsberg. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Monday Feb 20th 1995. "Look out Ned, you're in the middle of the road!" Guffaw! I thought I'd start todays text with a Chortles (tm) quote. I hope you enjoyed it. Hokay , what occurred today then? Hmmmm, well, Had an odd kind of morning. I just loaded loads of C64 demo's! I was kind of looking for a tune and some animated characters but really I wanted to watch lots of classic demo's! The front of this house is being demolished at the moment. There's a new bay window being put in. I guess that means a couple of weeks of MESS outside. Shite. Had a quick trip up the town to post my bits and to get a refund on a duff C15. Once back home I pissed around for HOURS copying about three files onto tape. Oh yes, I really like tapes me. F'kin love them lots. (B**TARDS!) Gave Jaz Kelk a quick ring. His FIVE disks arrived safely. Yippee! Watched the last part of 'Blood & Peaches' on TV. Pretty good proggy. Not much else happened so I won't type any more ... Nyaaaah! G'night! From:- Kaleidoscope. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Tuesday Feb 21st 1995. Joppa Froods. Attacked my bulging 'in-tray' today. Did heaps of obscure packages and sendings which have been nagging for my attention for yonks. This included a package for Equinox and stuff like that ... This took rather a long time but I spoze was worth it. Me mom got her NEW CAR today. Very flash it is too. Personalised plates and everything! It's lucky her initials are the same as mine ... HEHE! All I need is vast sums of dosh to get my name on the insurace and then it's 'ultra-pose time'! Got a few Commodore Zone and 'Mayhem' flyers copied and then sent all my post winging its way to various lucky, lucky people ... (?) I got a call from the kid who runs 'Commodore Magic'. The cheeky GET wanted to know how to erase the 'Binary Zone' message from a disk-directory so he could include the disk in his own library. FO*K OFF! Mat rang later on and bounced ideas for 'Chortle Kombat' off me. Kewl. Taped 'Babylon 5' in the evening which was pretty smart (as usual). 'ZZzzZZzzZZzzZZzz' is all I can remember after that. Byeee! From:- Klingon. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Wednesday Feb 22nd 1995. Hallo again! Had rather a lot of post this morning. Most of it was people asking for catalogues so I went into a berserk frenzy of cramming them into envelopes. That done I immediately zzoomed down the road to the postbox and shoved them in. All this excitement before 11 o'clock too! I received a 'Commodore Zone' article from Prof Brian Strain on paper but I soon had it all tapped into the Miggy. I also typed in some classic game reviews for the mag and worked out the page layout. Ran out of steam in the afternoon so I slobbed around a bit. The weather was going barmy outside! Hail, thunder, lightning, rain etc. Very impressive natural phenomena to watch. I just lurve thunderstorms! Andy 'Soggy Bottom' Roberts rang me (finally). We sorted out what he wanted for the CF article. Now all I've got to do type a list of 50 all-time great PD wotsits. Should be a laff. (?) He's gonna have a look at the Galway stuff to see if it's worth him doing the collection. OOO-EEE-OOO! Some other really great things probably happened but I can't remember them so I'm gonna piss orft. Byee! From:- Klaatu. (Wasn't he a Star Wars alien?) -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Thursday Feb 23rd 1995. Groggabogga readers! Yowza! What a funky day. Got lashings of BZ stuff sorted out. While I was doing busy type things the front of the house was removed! Yup, you could walk down the stairs and into the garden. Our hallway was the size of Droitwich. Well, it was until the builders started to fill in the MASSIVE hole they created. Finished reading the final 'Zahn' Star Wars novel today. Sob. What else did I do? Hmmmm, good question. Aaaaargh! (memory block) maybe I did some armpit farts (small fib) and killed some people (enormous lie) and ... and ... and ... Oh bollox. 'X-Files' was kewl tonight. Scully showed her legs! Oh, umm, I mean, A fascinating paranormal case was covered. (HEHE!) There was this BRILL 'Weird World' program on after it. They showed a picture of an actual dead alien which looked pretty damn real to me. AN ACTUAL DEAD ALIEN!!! (Calm down Kenz). Dunno what else to type. Must dash ... Other vital things demand my attention. (Okay, I've got a pizza in the oven). Cheerieciao. From:- Kenzippy. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Friday Feb 24th 1995. "Back from planet Scumball we have ..." Erm, these words from our sponsor! Well, I'm not sure where that obscure quote came from but It'll do for an intro to todays japes. Had to get my catalogues and disks copied in a rush because I was getting a lift up the town. This also meant I had a say in all the goodies I was bought from the SuperMarket for this Weekend. The house will be MINE all Weekend folks. HEHEHE! No parents, no problemo. Crafted an amusing birthday card for Colit. Merry Scumday Colit you senile old bastad! Met up with Mez and Colit at the boozah. He liked his card and especially liked the picture I glued inside it. It was a pic of the thrusty young babe from the film 'The Crush'. Keeeeewwwwlllll. Skulled plenty of TENNANTS EXTRA at the pub which will mean a definite HANGOVER for me. BAAHHHHH! Rich, Reecy, Chris and big Rob also joined us later on. There were plenty of classic quotes born this evening like:- "Your sitting where the wanking tramp was sitting!" "Where did Collett go with Chris's four quid? He's on a yacht in Morocco!" Smiley babe was there and there was another babe with amazing thrusting orbs but she was out of proportion - I.E. She had no neck! (Sort of). Got up to some drunken mischief on the way home. Mez got stopped by the coppas for putting a cone on a shop roof - but it was actually ME! HEHE! The most bizarre part of the evening was four of us WEARING litter bins! Yep, we walked through the park with a litter bin on our heads, peeping through the slot where poeple put the smelly bin rubbish. Guess who fell over? Bloody ME! I couldn't get up! Arf arf! Once back home at about 1 o'clock(ish) I just had to have a shower. The thought of the bin on my head made me feel ... dirty! G'night gang! From:- Kollapse. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Saturday Feb 25th 1995. Welcome, seekers of culture. Groan, MY HEAD! As predicted, I felt like shite. Oh well, no time to be poorly. Got up nice and early to prepare for the PAARRTYYYY that's going on later. Collett and Mez arrived and we scoped out some nifty Amiga demo's. Alien Breed 3D *IS* Doom! (A slightly slow and blocky Doom!) Pretty good though nonetheless. Had a rip on 'Return Of The Jelly' which later on decided to CRASH. SNES crashes are rather pretty! Showed the lads some bits of 'Chortle Kombat'. They were well impressed! We then hit the town for a SNACK ATTACK and bought some grog from the offie. All the ingredients were present for a FUN EVENING! Basically, we FREAKED OUT! There was lots of grog drinking, LOUD music, dancing, headbanging, a chinese takeaway, impossible amounts of porno film watching. We also watched all of 'Bad Taste' and got some awesome video footage in the can - "Eat this Lenny! (PHART!)". Tee Hee! We partied until 2 o'clock but then we couldn't continue due to all the leaping about. Much fun was had but you had to be there really. I guess you get the idea. Babe of the day:- Teri Hatcher. (New Superman series started tonight). That's all you're gerrin'. T.T.F.N. From:- Kavort. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Sunday Feb 26th 1995. Groan, MY HEAD! (Again). Oww, my aching neck! Yesterdays action has taken its toll on my being. I feel doubly shite. Mez and Collett had to leave quite early so I was left with the task of clearing up the house. It wasn't all that bad though. How many empty cans were there? LOTS! Watched some of the footage we filmed last night. Ideal 'music video' fodder. Some of Lee 'Grog in my hair' Colletts headbanging was clinically strange! Once the house was tidy I thought I'd have a bit of lie down to recover. Unfortunately, this made me feel WORSE!! Later in the day I watched 'The Thing'. Just 'The Thing' to clear my upset stomach! (Errmmmm). Cooked a bleggggy meal of 'Micro-Curry'. It said cook it for 3 mins. I did and the bastard was STILL FROZEN!! Doi?! It took 9 MINS in the end. Nyeeeuuurrrr! Micro-Meals! After lunch I fell asleep. Ahhhh, bliss. It was one of those 'mid afternoon naps where you drool' type sleeps. Felt a lot better after that. Watched a MAGNIFICENT episode of Star Trek The Next Generation in the afternoon and then a pretty cack episode of 'Knight Rider' after that. Nowt else to report. See ya soon. From: Knight Industries 2000. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Monday Feb 27th 1995. "Trumpet trumpet trumpet, bugle bugle bugle"! Yes Fannzzz, a new record has been set. The 1993 diary didn't reach this point thanks to my Amiga 500 exploding but here we are in 1995, relentlessly forging onwards with japes aplenty. Actually, I should have said this bit yesterday but I was hung-over (FNIMM) so I forgot. What a spaz. Thousands of people are clambering around the 'Zone' attacking it with chainsaws. Okay guys, I WILL PAY THE PHONE BILL. I promise. Perhaps they represent rival PD libraries and they are trying to cut their way into the BZ-HQ to stab me in the back. My verdict? F'KAAAAAARF! (Oh, it's only the builders. Silly me). Designed the Galway demo today. SEUCK returns! HEHE! It looks rather tidy now ... Terendy. Anthropoid Tampons will hopefully be coding the menu and Jon Wells has agreed to do the other bits. Yippppeeeee! Began taping 'Super Return Of The Jelly'. Got pretty far and am now running and leaping around the new Death Star (as you do). Didn't do much else. Hyah hyah! (Sid James-esque laffter). Oh yeah, My neck still bloody hurts! Death by headbanging! I'm offski now. Be good. From:- Kegs & rubbish & Richard. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Tuesday Feb 28th 1995. KER-THUDDDDD! That was todays post arriving. Everyone decided to drop me a line! Thanks chums! Amongst the myriad of letters there was a bulging jiffy from Angler Rubbers stuffed liberally with PC fonts and SEUCK swag. Much joypole thrashing ensued. (Titter). Someone was having a good bang outside my window. I'm not sure why the builders need to revamp that particular part of the Zone. Maybe they know they are PISSING ME OFF with all their racket. Got a package posted to Jon Wells with my Galway demo designs. Also got my disk orders dispatched straight away. Am I a hero or what?! Got the rest of 'Jedi' taped. I now have the entire trilogy of Star Wars games recorded for me to keep and enjoy for ever. I dunno what I'll do with the recordings but who cares ... They're MINE and I like them so f'k yooooooo if you've got a problem with that. Scoffed massive amounts of pancakes for tea. Y-U-M ... ! Splendid. Watched the 'Cardiac Arrest' proggy thing. There's a well tasty babe in it - with an attitude ... DAMN! I just love that. Bloody crikey, February 1995 is over. It's about time I wasn't here. (Yeah, about time I was sent to the retirement home for bewildered PD librarians!) Avast there me hearties, set sail for March! Ahaaarrrrrr! Split the poop, swab the deck, seventeen longships, those were the days etc etc. Until next month it's bye-bye from:- The Klangers. P.S. CHODDER! (Hope you enjoyed that Andy!) -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-